After a long, treacherous winter finally summer has arrived. The sun is shining gloriously in the brilliant blue sky while a gentle fragrant breeze of flowering trees softens over my body. After six long months of cold, dreary weather our long awaited reward has finally arrived.
I realized today that I have not written on this blog since the cold spell of February. A lot has passed over those months. I went to Cuba. I visited my family in Tucson. My dad’s cancer ebbed and flowed. My soul rose and dropped. I realized that like the stagnant, harsh winter my soul had somewhat frozen as well and I was trapped in a daily fight for simply getting through the day.
I kept myself busy. Perhaps too busy. With yoga, volunteering, running or anything that got me out of the house. I also kept away from my computer and writing in here. I felt that sharing my inner soul would hurt too much. So I turned back to my more impersonal storytelling on my other blogs. They were easier and an escape.
I wrote a heartfelt piece on Elephant Journal about my life since my father’s diagnosis with cancer. It is a battle that has had many ups and downs. Many false hopes, disappointments and renewed faith. I’ve realized that unfortunately he will never be completely free of cancer. His kind is the type that tends to come back again and again. Although he is currently cancer free for the moment, it is only a moment. I sincerely hope it never comes back again but there is a possibility that it will. So I have to remain positive and strong.
I look forward to the upcoming months of summer. To a return to a more relaxed, easier pace of life. A time to live in the moment and spend time outdoors and with my family. A time to appreciate all the wonderful things we have on this earth. And try to remember these words:
“Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.” – Andy Rooney
Attitude is key.
Your part of the country deserves to finally have some beautiful weather. I believe I can relate to how you feel about your father’s journey with cancer. Although I try not to dwell on this subject, I find that it still hovers in the shadows. Terry recently shared with me that he suspects his cancer will come back again at some point, which is why he tries to live out each day to the fullest. I am the worrier, trying to make sure his diet is as healthy as possible, etc. etc. My thoughts are so often with you Nicole. Big hugs being sent your way.
Thanks LuAnn! We thought it was all clear and then it shocked us by growing back slightly. It is a month by month basis. Hard. But we are still fighting and he is still doing amazing! 🙂
You are all in my prayers.
You are so kind LuAnn! 🙂